Types of Relationships

There are many different types of relationships, romantic and non-romantic. 

Casual dating 

Dating, meeting new people and going on dates, without an expectation or desire for a committed relationship is called casual dating. This may or may not involve sex or ‘one-night stands’ or ‘links’. 

Casual sex 

Some people don’t want any kind of relationship and are purely looking for sex and physical intimacy and nothing more. This type of relationship is often called ‘friends with benefits. Some people prefer to have casual sex with someone who they know and may see in other social circles. 

Relationships based on sex look different for everyone, but some may: 

• Involve last minute texts and plans to meet and have sex 

• Involve planning in advance 

• Have irregular communication, or talk in code 

• Keep each other a secret or on the down-low 

• Sleep over or have strict no-sleeping over rules 

If any of these aspects make you feel unhappy, uncomfortable, or unsafe in the relationship, it may be worth considering whether this type of relationship and situation is for you.  

Situationships  

Sometimes people have a relationship that goes beyond sex but isn’t committed, official or exclusive. These sorts of relationships are often called ‘situationships’.  

What does a situationship look like? 

• Limited time: some people may have a limited time in a specific location, or a big change on the horizon that means they cannot commit to a relationship but would still like to enjoy their time with someone.  

• Smaller commitment: you meet less often than you would in a relationship, so it doesn’t take up too much of your time or energy 

• More independent: you may not introduce them to your friends or meet theirs. You also might not post about them on social media 

• Not exclusive: sometimes in a situationship you might both agree that you will see other people at the same time 

Monogamy 

Monogamy is where both partners agree to only be in a relationship with one another, meaning they aren’t seeing or dating anyone else.  

Non-monogamy and Polyamory 

Non-monogamy is where partners agree that they want to be together and are open and honest about the fact that they have other partners. For this reason, it is also sometimes referred to as ethical non-monogamy. 

Polyamory is a type of non-monogamy where people have loving relationships with more than one person. Whereas in non-monogamous relationships, such as open relationships, love is reserved for one person but they may have sexual relationships with other people. 

What if you don’t agree about non-monogamy?

So what if it turns out that you and your partner are in very different places on the monogamy or non-monogamy spectrum? 

If you are monogamous, you may feel hurt and rejected if your partner wants to be with other people as well. And if you are non-monogamous you may feel suffocated by the idea of monogamy and resent your monogamous partner’s demands.

You are different in this respect, but it doesn’t mean that one of you is wrong. What it does mean is that, if you are going to be together, you will both need to make compromises. Bear in mind that this is true in all long-term relationships.

The important thing is to be honest and clear with each other about what you want from your relationship and about any concerns you have. That way you may be able to work together to come up with a set of relationship rules or a contract that means you can both be happy. 

If you are the monogamous partner, you may say that you want to meet your partner’s other partners, for example. If you are non-monogamous, you may ask that your other partners are treated with respect. 

The important thing is that, once you agree your relationship rules, you stick to them unless you both agree to renegotiate them. Breaking the rules, lying, cheating or not looking after each other’s feelings will all put extra strain on your relationship (and, of course, that goes for monogamous relationships as well). 

You may decide that a monogamous/non-monogamous relationship is not for you and agree to go your separate ways. While this may be painful it’s important to remember that neither of you means to hurt the other. It’s simply that the differences between you were too wide to bridge.

Each relationship is unique to those involved in it. One type of relationship isn't 'better' than another type, and all can be successful if they are built on trust, communication, and consent.